Dealing With Depression After Hysterectomy

If you recently had a hysterectomy and are still feeling depressed and out of sorts, I want to assure you... it really does get better. For me, I saw significant improvement between the fourth and fifth weeks. My relief was multi-faceted.

Still a Woman?

First off, I had to deal with feeling "less than" because I no longer have a uterus. Less than a woman, less desirable, less feminine, less than whole. I had to realize that I'm much more than a uterus, that I'm not defined by my fertility. This was challenging at first, but it all comes down to a quality of life issue. I realized that I could've gone another 10 years or more with my uterus, suffering day after day, but being "complete." Would that make me more of a woman? I think not.

I wasn't happy like that-- the pain, the mood swings, the constant bleeding. It was no way to live. So, now I've lost my uterus, but so what? I've also lost the pain and the bleeding. To me, it's a pretty good trade-off. I'm guessing yours was, too!

I would suggest that you take some time to think of the things you gave up by having surgery-- bleeding, pain, bloating, mood swings, risk of uterine cancer, fibroids, etc. Write it down so you can refer to it later. Now, write down the things you'll eventually gain-- more even moods, life without pain, freer social life (no planning things after your bleeding), more spontaneous sex life, etc. If you have a spouse and children, include the benefits to them as well-- they'll immediately see the beauty of a happier, healthier, more energetic you! See which list outweighs the other. Keep this list in a safe place-- you'll need to refer back to it often.

Deal With Any Deficiencies

You'll also want to deal with any hormonal deficiencies you have. Whether you have your ovaries or not, you could be showing signs of menopause. It's important to have your hormone levels checked, especially if you're experiencing hot flashes and night sweats. If possible, have a saliva test instead of the blood.

I've been taking Complete Balance for Menopause. There is an AM formula and a PM one, and it gave me almost immediate relief. Not only are my hot flashes gone, I'm also feeling happier and more energetic. I'm also using Pro-Gest, a natural progesterone cream.

In addition, I'm taking L-tyrosine and 5-HTP. This is because I show symptoms of a serotonin deficiency. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter largely responsible for feelings of calm, relaxation, and happiness. If you're deficient, you will feel anxious and irritable. As an added benefit, serotonin is responsible for feelings of sexual desire.

Please note that I'm not suggesting you take the same supplements I'm using. I'm not a doctor and I know nothing about your specific situation. I am suggesting that you check with your doctor. If your doctor isn't helpful, read books about hormone help. Pharmacists are also helpful.

The bottom line is relief is available. You may have to search for the answers, but the answers are out there.

There is life after hysterectomy... and it's good. Enjoy!

Depression After Your Hysterectomy

It's been three weeks since my hysterectomy, and I'm feeling pretty good... physically. Emotionally? Well, that's another story. In my head, I'm perfectly okay with my surgery: I'm looking forward to life without pain and periods. I'm even (mostly) okay with the idea that I'll never have more children. So why am I feeling so weepy?

Everything is making me cry. I read about hysterectomy; I cry. My daughter says something sweet; I cry. I hear a song on the radio; I cry. My doctor tells me I'm brave to have made this decision; I cry. I see a dog food commercial; I cry. Okay, maybe the dog food thing is an exaggeration, but not by much. I can't even explain the tears... there is no logical reason for it. But, is it normal?

It seems there are many possible reasons for the weepiness:

• I'm not sleeping
• I'm frustrated that I can't do so many of the things I'm used to doing
• My hormones are a little out of whack
• I'm caught off guard by my large, swollen belly
• Hysterectomy is, by nature, an emotional surgery and it takes time to sort out the feelings
• The body has been through trauma, and complete healing takes time
• There is a bit of confusion over the exact cause of my pre-hysterectomy bleeding and, by extension, the surgery itself

At this point in the game, we're going on the assumption that this slight depression is a normal by-product of my hysterectomy. My doctor prescribed sleeping pills and mild anti-anxiety pills. He is also checking my hormone levels. Since I'm also having night sweats and hot flashes, there is a possibility that my hormone levels are off. We're going to give it some time.

Warning Signs

Although it's normal to be a bit down after hysterectomy, the blues can become full-blown depression, and depression needs to be treated. You must contact your doctor if:

• You are having thoughts of suicide or wishing for death
• Your sadness makes it impossible for you to function on a daily basis
• Your sadness doesn't lessen over time. Definitely talk to your doctor if you are still feeling depressed beyond six weeks post-op.
• You are having thoughts of violence
• You are experienceing feelings of rage

Remember, there is no shame in being depressed. Depression is often caused by hormone or chemical imbalances, and it can be treated. Do not be afraid or embarrassed to seek treatment. You deserve to be happy!

There is life after hysterectomy... and it's good. Enjoy!

Even Moms Mourn After Hysterectomy

If one more person tells me that I have three kids, I will scream. The implication is, of course, that I have kids, so I shouldn't care that I no longer have a uterus. It is so frustrating! Yes, I have kids. Yes, I'm thrilled about that. Yes, my family was probably complete. But, the possibility existed, the possibility of more children. Just knowing that I could dream about it... I could fantasize sometimes about having a son or another beautiful daughter... I could hold a baby and think, "someday..."

Now, I know there will never be another someday for me. My somedays are dead and gone, nothing but sweet memories, a precious time that passed so quickly. I'll never again snuggle an infant of my own, I'll never again experience the life-giving thrill of nursing my own flesh and blood. Never again...

Although people act like I'm nuts, that's a real loss for me and I'm mourning it. Faulty or not, that uterus nurtured and grew my daughters, and now it's gone. So, if one more person tells me, "So what if you lost your uterus? You weren't using it anyway!" I just might have to reply, "So, why don't you give up your heart? You clearly aren't using it!"

After Hysterectomy, I'm Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving! The day would not be complete without a list of things I'm thankful for, so here goes:

1. My husband... he has been so supportive and loving through this ordeal, insisting I stay off my feet as much as possible (like I'm going to argue with that!)

2. My kids... they've been good through this, too (for the most part), keeping their fighting, "Mama, she started it!", and daily drama to a minimum.

3. My Swelly Belly... it came in the mail today and it's sooooooo great.

4. My doctor's skillful hands...

5. God for guiding my doctor's hands.

6. The makers of Darvocet for getting me through the first days post-op.

7. The mind's ability to forget... I barely recall those first moments after surgery.

8. Sweat pants, tee shirts, and loose nightgowns... you can never have too many comfy clothes post-op.

9. My heating pad... we've spent many quality hours together this year.

10. That I get to work at home, doing what I love.

11. That I have children at all... with my infertility troubles, I really never thought I'd be blessed with kids.

12. The days ahead, pain- and period-free.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

On My Mind Post-Hysterectomy

Now that I'm approaching two weeks post-op, I have lots of questions. Actually, I'm having trouble even sleeping, there's so much on my mind! Here are just a few of the things I finding myself pondering at 2am:

1. Will I ever have a semi-normal looking belly again?
2. Will these hot flashes continue?
3. Will I need hormone therapy despite keeping my ovaries?
4. Am I still a "real" woman?
5. Will I still desire sex?
6. Will orgasms feel the same?
7. What will sex without pain be like?
8. Will be husband desire me now that I'm "incomplete"?
9. Since I still have my ovaries and will, in theory, still ovulate, will I have PMS?

Goodbye To My Uterus

I'm 32, and I'm one week post-op. I had a total abdominal hysterectomy. I have such mixed feelings right now, and by that I mean I'm having total mood swings about it! In one moment, I'm looking forward to a life without periods and pain, but in the next I'm seeing a beautiful baby and mourning the fact that I'll never have another one. Sure, I have three kids and odds are, I wouldn't have wanted another one, but still.... just knowing it was possible...

At this point, things are too new for me to really say much about the results of my surgery, but I plan to chronicle the journey here. You'll learn more about what led me to have such drastic surgery at this age... you'll learn about options for women facing this life-altering decision... and you'll learn about my life without a uterus!